The shit just hit my face.

The shit as in the reality that in 29 days i will be ‘unemployed’ in the traditional sense.

But that’s not really what’s scaring me though . . .

What’s really scaring me is this overwhelming since of calm i’m feeling about this whole big leap thing.

It’s unexpected and welcomed at the same time.

Still . . .

For a control freak like me (as my partner lovingly describes me), it’s a little jarring – this sense of calm, this place of ease . . .

What do you think that is?

Really, i’d like to know. Cause i don’t have a fucking clue . . .

Have any of you out there in entrepreneurial land experienced this?

Is this what they mean by the calm before the storm?

Am i about to get whipped up into tornado season?

Is shit going to hit the fan?

Am i just working myself up now into a tizzy because that’s what ‘they say’ i’m supposed to be doing?

That i’m supposed to be feeling freaked out and anxious?

And what does it say/mean that i’m not?

More questions than answers – maybe answered in the near future.

For now, i’ll just allow myself to sit in this comfort of calm.

Because i’m willing to bet that i’m about to show up in all my frantic + panic glory any moment now.

i mean i have 29 days . . .

i’m bound to show up sometime, right?

Maybe not.

Either way, i’ll keep you posted.

xo-b