Saturday night i was in Fort Worth performing at Crescent Moon’s Belly dance hafla. It was sold out show and the line-up was too DIE FOR (as was the stage). i was lucky enough to have a seat up front to watch the first half. A beautiful soloist with a long red wavy Rapunzel-like ponytail came out shaking her hips and making music with her finger tips. Half way through her solo she was running her zilled fingers through her hair when all of a sudden one got caught tangled in her tresses.
The audience let out an audible gasp and for a split second a look of utter fear ran across her eyes . . .
Unexpected stage snafus happen to us all and in order to be the most sickening performers we can be, we need to be prepared for any + everything. So i put together this groovy collection of tips so that if and when disaster strikes on stage you’ll never miss a beat!!
The first golden snafu rule ::
DON’T PANIC. i know it sucks and it’s easy to get caught up in the drama of the moment, but if you panic you’ll be too flustered to react quickly 🙂 )
Snafu :: Your costume catches, your jewelry snags your hair, or you get tangled in your veil + other sticky situations.
How to get through it like a #boss :: Be kitschy, sexy, cute + coy while you try to untangle, unjam or unsnag yourself. By turning your snafu into a performance, you’ll woo your crowd over with your charismatic ability to handle anything that’s thrown your way! But if sexy and cute ain’t cutting it and you’re still stuck, just yank, rip, or pull the bitch out/off.
Snafu :: You fall
How to get through it like a #boss :: Pretend like you meant to go to the floor like this fierce queen –
Snafu :: Your bra unsnaps or pops off, belly dance belt snaps pop + any other costume malfunctions.
- You can continue performing. During Miss Gay USofA week a former USofA queen’s silver chain metal bra unsnapped. Without a nano second hesitation, her hands flew up to her chest to keep the girls from revealing themselves. She spent the rest of the 5 minute number holding up her bra STILL dancing the house down and collecting her (serious) coins! #profeshfish
- If you feel like you can’t pull off an onstage recovery, gracefully (read = keep performing) exit the stage . . . OR
- If you costume decides to completely fall off, you can either grab it or leave it there before jetting to the nearest stage wing.
Whatever happens and which ever solution you chose, if you have the opportunity to engage with your audience after your snafu show DO IT! Getting your face back out there shows the audience that you can and will overcome ANYTHING – even something as embarrassing as your costume falling off. Own it and it can never be used against you. And if you really want some #uberboss points, don’t be afraid to smile and laugh about it.
Snafu :: Your earring or some other piece of jewelry comes flying off (*raises hand* totally guilty of this!), your hair piece falls out + other items being flung about.
How to get through it like a #boss :: If its an earring, pull the other one off and chunk it or lay it on table if there’s one nearby. If it’s a necklace, bracelet, or anything else let it fall and have someone retrieve it once you’ve finished your performance and left the stage. If your hair piece falls out, you have two choices. Run off the stage because you’re too embarrassed to continue
pick that weave up and turn that bitch into your mother fucking prop! Whip your hair back and forth literally. Serve it up like you own + believe it and your audience will too!
Snafu :: Your boobs (or tuck!!) comes out – EEK!!
How to get through it like a #boss :: Body parts coming out to play can be a little tricky. Play this snafu by ear. If your boob quickly pops out, turn your back to the audience and pop it back in. If you feel it trying to sneak itself out, readjust with your back to the audience.
If you tuck starts untucking – gracefully leave the stage, make the proper adjustments, and get your ass back onstage. If it comes out during a split and/or some other trick, come out of the trick and sashay to wings of the stage, adjust, come back out.
And when all else fails take a cue from one of the stage goddesses herself, Idina Menzel. She handled her underboob gate FLAW LESS LY!!!
Here’s to you slaying your stage time!
Love, light + lashes,
P.S. What is your worse stage snafu and how did you handle it? Share your story in the comment below.
P.P.S. After a few seconds (which i’m sure felt like a lifetime on the stage) the beautiful red headed belly dancer untangled her zill from her hair, slid it back onto her finger, and continued to play beautiful music until her performance was over. #winning