In 39 years i’ve:
Started 10+ jobs, gotten 2 degrees, toured with multiple dance + festival companies, taken to the streets, protested, and lobbied for my rights as a queer woman of color, been called the N word, lived in 4 different places, traveled to almost every single Caribbean island there is, left my day job to be a full-time creative, sipped on some awesome cocktails, won a national drag pageant, failed more often than i won, opened up for Lady Gaga, got married, won 1st place in the Junior Olympics, been told i was fat & ugly and lived to tell about it.
That’s a lot of life.
And i’ve learned a lot of things.
Today,¬†i want to share 39 of the most epic lessons i’ve learned in all that living.¬†May they bring you bits of magic, a lot of love, and many years of living courageously.


1. We wake up every morning to the theater of our life. Live like it. And, for the love of goddess, let’s make sure we are the one’s who are directing — not just staring — in it!
2.¬†Don’t let the shade of others smolder your shine.
3. There will always be haters — just make sure the biggest one isn’t yourself.
4. Be a fucking unicorn. Or whatever kind of magical creature — a phoenix, a mermaid, a warlock, a white walker — your heart and soul desires.
5. No matter how much you want to love and give yourself over to someone, it will never happen if you first can’t love or surrender to yourself.
6. Say no — often.
7. But don’t be afraid to say yes even when the world says no. In fact, that’s usually the best time to say yes!
8. But also know that some of the things you are most resistant to are also the very things you need. Dig into your no. If you are saying no because it doesn’t feel good, stick with it. But if you are saying no because something scares you, or out of habit, or because a ‘yes’ makes you uncomfortable, change your answer.
9. Fuck the mainstream, male gaze-driven beauty standards, find your own brand of glam and be your own kind of beautiful.
10. The universe has your back — always.
11. You are special. Remember that.
12. Feed your soul whatever food it needs — even if it tastes bitter (or like shit) going down.
13. Stop trying to turn yourself into something. Be the queen you already are.
14. Gratitude — and a ritual around it —
15. Animals make everything better.
16. So does a good craft cocktail — or a special blend of tea or coffee.
17. You have always known what you’re meant to do. What your calling is. We did it in our own way as children. i would create all kinds of things: books, a jam-packed audience made of stuff animals to watch me perform. i would gaze at the stars for hours and read astronomy books. The thing that will light your soul on fire today¬†can be found in the things you loved to do as kid. Dig into your memory until you’ve found it.
18. ¬†No one is going to make your dreams come true for you. You’ve got to get out and make that shit happen for yourself.
19. You are enough. Always. 
20. We are all connected. It’s all connected. Live and create connectively.
21. Trust your processes. We all have our own natural rhythm and way of doing things. Even if it’s long and arduous (like mine), trust it. There is a method to the madness.
22. Always follow your light rabbits — those things that light you up from the inside out.
23. Live your life in full-blown color. Even if the masses want the world to be black and white, show up in your most epic shade of your favorite color. Mine? Rainbow ūüėČ .
24. You can make a difference.

Be the change you wish to see in the world. ~ Mahatma Gandhi

One person can make a difference, and everyone must try. ~ John F. Kennedy

Those my two life quotes. Find your life quotes and live them daily.
25. Create your own wonderland. Be yourself. Do the work.
26. Break the rules. Live beyond the labels. And burn the boxes that bind you to places and a self you no longer wish to be.
27. Never be afraid to speak your dreams out loud — just make sure the ears they fall on are supportive
28.¬†Don’t ever be afraid to fail. Fail a lot. Privately. Publically. Socially. Failure is the only guarantee to success.
29. We already have everything we need to be successful. We just need to remember or unearth our own magic.
30. Say ‘i love you’ often. To others but most importantly to yourself.
31. You don’t need degrees, a title, or a job to define you. You are what you say you are. And you live the life you believe you do. Speak, dream, and believe your best life into being.
32. We are magic.
33. It’s all about energy. We are energy. And we¬†emanate energy. The question is: what kind of energy are you releasing into the world? The energy you give is the energy you receive. Don’t poison the world — or yourself.
34. Laugh often. And don’t be afraid to cry just as much. Crying releases toxins that clog up your emotions. Be emotionally. And give no fucks to others who would see emotionality as a weakness.
35. Recharge yourself by whatever means possible. Whether that’s via meditation, prayer, yoga, or traveling. Take time to infuse yourself with life.
36. You only get one shot at life in this particular form, shape, qualities, circumstances, and experiences. Make the most of it by remembering that the things that most often worry us the most are self-inflicted and man-made. Money and time are all manmade concepts.
37. Define success on your own terms. Being successful, living a successful life isn’t a one size fits all kinda gig. It’s haute couture, not fast fashion. Take a moment to really get to know what success looks and feels like to you that way you know when you’ve arrived.
38. Be whoever the fuck you are. 
39. Love will enter through a doorway that you never thought to open. She will sneak up on you when you least expect it. Stay open to love. Don’t let the world (or fairytales) jade you. You come from love. You are love. And you will receive love. Be open to the many ways love shows up.



Thank you for spending another year with me, my words, and my art. Your time, presence, and support is the greatest gift you could me. And i am so humbly grateful.

As a way to show my thanks and undying love for you and all that you have given me, ¬†i’ve bundled all my best-selling digital books:

at SPECIAL ONE-DAY ONLY BIRTHDAY RATE OF $39. You save $20 — it’s like a getting a book and 1/2 for free!!!

Get the Bundle!

Or claim the b-day magic here.

The birthday sale ends at midnight.
Enjoy the love. And celebrate the awesome New Year energy that’s heading our way in 4 days!
Love, light, and living our best life ever,